Our Baitul Muslim - PART I

Seperti yang dijanji kan...and with Abang Yusof's approval....I will tell our story of love...you might ask, kenapa nak cite perkahwinan sendiri, cam orang lain tak de yg kahwin ke..hehe..but I hope by sharing this story will maybe help others in their quests in fulfilling half of the deen, dan juga semoga kita semua dapat amik yang baik sebagai pengajaran dan yang buruk sebagai pengajaran, inshaAllah...

I also thought that our story is unique and before this happened, penulis tak sangka it will or can happen at all to herself, but now, the author learned and believed that if Allah wills, anything can happen...

Maaf seperti biasa tulisan campur english and malay, out of kelemahan penulis untuk menulis full in malay...

Background cerita kami

Kami dikenalkan oleh pihak ketiga....jadinya, i dont really kenal abang yusof, never ever seen him in my entire life before...i know that he is a student in Al Azhar University and he joins usrah over there...that is about as much as I know of him...and from our correspondence with emails, i also know that he is a very quiet and skema person...hehe (jangan marah,abang ;-) ) After a few more correspondence, I learned that our background is very different...he lived in Sabah, and he is not even a malay, he is a Bajau, and his family lifestyle is really different than mine, they live very modestly and had to work hard since a child, while for me, alhamdulillah, Allah has blessed us with many blessings....so there we were...

At first, i didnt feel interested as much, due to ALL of our differences ..but later on, Allah has opened my heart to do istikharah, so I did.... perhaps Allah will guide me to a closure on this matter....and miraculously, everytime after solah istikharah, i felt that calmness and serenity...but again my brain took over the heart (or is it syaitan) and starts calculating all the differences that we had, and so, in the end, I decided to 'test' him..

The test

Oh by the way, all the while, Abang Yusof mmg lama dah determine nak kahwin, dunno la, from what he told me after we got married, he did istikharah and immediately feels and determined that I am the one for him (he decided well before he saw my picture)...so memang tak jadi masalah on his part...the problem was from my side...iskk...

At that time Abang Yusof was still in Egypt, and the flight ticket to go back to Malaysia was not cheap, plus considering he was studying with his own money, and no scholarship... oh ye, gambar disebelah is the first picture that he gave me...hensem gak la :), that was him in his house in Tanta...

Anyway, I told abang yusof that if he really wants to get married to me, he should first call my father...(for your information, my father is very strict aka garang...bertempat la of course, anak2 semua hormat pada dia, so, it will be a tough challenge for anybody to talk to my dad at that time)...plus my father pernah refuse a hand in marriage from another al azhar student....lagi la challenging for abg yusof...

So, I gave him my father's phone number, and I told him that if my father says OK, we can proceed...abang yusof yang pemalu ni berkobar2 and rang my dad...surpisingly, my father lembut hati pulak...boleh chat lama2...at that time i was thinking, doa apa la ustaz ni duk baca...hehehe

Syaitan still plays tricks on me... dia tu cam ni lah, cam tu lah etc etc... but everytime (honestly)..everytime solat istikharah mesti rasa aman dan tenteram, tak pernah felt like that before..cuma lepas beberapa jam, syaitan cucuk balik...so, i decided to test him again...(iskk, mesti org pikir jahatnye makcik ni...well...that was what I can think of at that time)...

I told him that if he is serious, he need to come to my house in Selangor and meet my parents...if they are happy with him, i will just follow (masa tu tak leh fikir secara waras dah, banyak sgt cucukan syaitan yg menghasut berfikiran secara duniawi)...but there is no assurance that they will accept him or I will accept him...just have to do it and see....

Amazingly, abang yusof gather the money and balik Malaysia....(I thought if not serious, dia akan kata tak worth ke, apa ke)....sampai di KLIA my parents jemput abang yusof...dah siap2 bagi gambar kat ayah, so that mereka tahu mana satu abang yusof....

His courage and my family

Since ambil kat KLIA, abang yusof stayed in my parents house for maybe seminggu...(imagine duk ngan rumah orang yg tak dikenali, dan juga berniat nak kahwin ngan anak tuan rumah tu)...disebabkan at that time he has no relatives in selangor...

But of course my family, is a hospitable family...mereka layan abang yusof seeloknya, very welcoming....cuma kelakar la a bit, ayah masa tu tak henti2 amik gamba abang yusof ...susun abang yusof berdiri ngan adik beradik lain...and sent all the pictures to me by email since I was still in UK and i have never seen this man face to face... its just that in my family semua tinggi2...in fact i was the shortest, after my mom...hehe...

Coming back to me, I always have difficulties in making decision of my life, normally I will just ask my parents to decide for me, coz its very easy, and am sure, they will really think hard of what is best for their daughter...so I told my dad, if ayah dan mak suka, kak lin ikut je...dan ketika itulah, my dad scolded me and said...we cannot determine the future for you, you need to decide, and you cannot decide until you have met the man face to face (as per sunnah to see the person you want to get married beforehand)....I still remember, my dad even said to me...this is more important that the phD, this will be your life, until the end of breath and till the hereafter...

I told my dad to say to abang yusof that i will give my decision when i come back for raya in 2 months time (sbb dh beli tiket dah nak balik raya)... tapi ayah, again scolded me...he said, mana boleh buat ustaz tu tertunggu2 camtu, dahlah dia duduk rumah kita dah dekat seminggu, kene bagi keputusan secepat mungkin..tak baik menzalimi orang...he told me to go back to malaysia ASAP...

So...the next thing i knew, i rushed to buy flight tickets to Malaysia...kelam kabut...akhirnya dapat the next day nye flight...haru biru time tu ngan kene amik tiket kat kedai cina di manchester la (alhamdulillah ada maziah who accompany me during the haru biru time...hehe, thanks)...dan akhirnya... i was on the flight back to Malaysia...

Bersambung.....

ps: inshaAllah in the end, akan di ringkaskan of all the lessons we can learn from this piece of our lives..